lay me in a bed of azaleas help me forgive all of my failures Im in need of love, not in need of no savior knees weak, save my prayers for later grab me a glass, I'm downing this gin and I'm downing this tonic, mix with the chronic, feel nothing else when I'm on it man this shit is hypnotic bad habits, robotic, my lungs fill will tar and on snapchat I flaunt at least I resorted to substance instead of violence I came up with these plans in midst of the silence sshh ease your lips take a rest there's a very distinctive smell of alcohol and guilt upon your breath whisper in my ear and nibble on my neck blinded by lust, I give it all, no regrets You can be Iverson, I can be your check Let my guard down, you got nothing but net So just shoot it. Im tired of these games, why does everything we do need to be so damn convoluted Its stupid, Im not going through it, gave you 3 chances, you me 3 strikes, ya you blew it I shoulda knew it when my friends did shoulda payed more for new lenses your goodbye was a blessing and a lesson attachments to demons keep me stressing why all these anti depressants so depressing closed my eyes, woke up in a counselling session lay me in a bed of azaleas help me forgive all of my failures Im in need of love, not in need of no savior knees weak, save my prayers for later I am miss King, I had a dream jesus came back and he came right to me. he grabbed my hand and he lead me to the light relived my whole life, in a single night he told me.. young child, hold your tears release your pain and your fears life is a game, a house full of mirrors when I woke up again things had never felt clearer I'm perfectly fucked and that's perfectly fine things will get different when you give it time I am not christian but I have been blind love is the concept, we’re falling behind Follow a god, or come follow me find peace in the forest, the wind and the trees lay me in a bed of azaleas help me forgive all of my failures Im in need of love, not in need of no savior knees weak, save my prayers for later Lay me in a bed of azaleas Lay me down, make no sound Heart beat rest, eternal peace for you now Lay me down, lay me down Lay me down, lay me down Lay me in a bed of azaleas

18 years, got the bills and they stackin it's never really been my plan, to pay it off rappin I'm not saying that I'm the one you need to watch for I'm saying keep an eye on me like the raptors fourth quarter score Cause I'm either gonna make it or I'll blow it there ain't no in between, I'm living for the moment all these city rappers posted up just like they own it ya success is real but you ain't earned it till you shown it I guess that's the life lessons moms been preachin bout shit you learn yourself, I'm still learning to watch my mouth I'm still learning to watch my health, I take greens everyday like I think it'll help my clique bougie, summer models in the jacuzzi social media makin life look a movie but I keep mine original like orange julius smoothies, sue me keep my circle small like 6 friends only 2 real, 3 fake, 1 day one and I'm still lonely you know only 2 outta that crew phone me that's how I know who my real homies chorus yeah, one day Imma have that money, swimming in the moola shades on during winter, cause you know there's nothing cooler all these other hoes wanna be me when they see me run up to curb and I beat em off like breezy It's easy, to get caught up in the lights and the game but I won't lose myself cause Im not chasing fame I plan to get my money long there ain't much else to say I'm just trying get these ideas out my brain it's funny, how I used to be a wannabe then I went through puberty, now these niggas wanting me and calling me I'm steady waiting for apologies and I'm so damn tired of all of these 2 faced hatin fans, just tryna link up with the bands, talking bout how they was friends, way back before the benz I really don't buy that shit, keep lies out my life, I'm really not bout that shit hook yeah, words raw, cause I'm the real truth you know it's straight flames, when I'm up in the booth imma fly my team to paris or peru working all day and night, it's what you gotta do mastering my craft and only telling few put a spin on the words and change your point of view make you rethink the shit, you already knew walk around wondering why the fuck the sky is blue azalea gang got the juice, riding in the coop azalea gang got the juice, we on the latest scoop check my twitter, just tryna stay in the loop don't take to my spot, Imma tell ya to up and scoot when I told you about this rap shit I was serious try to fuck with me, I'll finish you, I'm imperious got all the outsiders staked out trying to peer at us we in here making real hits, they nefarious its just the beginning, don't take this shit lightly Imma be back when my mixtapes done, I'm hyphy haters stay mad, out here tryna spite me I don't give a fuck, if you a real g, fight me

Without a sound ever heard Without a lesson Ive learned You’re foolish and deluding Too many lies have you burned So many times, so many lines So many long days and sleepless nights You made me blind, I ignored all the signs You up and left, I tried to make it right I still loved you in spite of your delusional life Every word that you said cut me deep like a knife. I was hooked on the thought of what I’d always wanted Didn’t realize your infectious eyes would be daunted I’ve grown a lot since, found peace in a prince Up my music taste, now I listen to Vince Now Im sinking in sin, would you have believed me then? Party sober advocate, turned around the wrong bend. I guess we all full of lies With time I recognize that happiness is just some sadness in disguise I know one day the sun will rise, bring light and peace of mind The truth will come out, no shadows to hide behind. Without a sound ever heard Without a lesson Ive learned You’re foolish and deluding Too many lies have you burned How many lies did you tell me? How many lies did you tell her? How many lies did you tell your baby momma before she finally saw what she worth? Thats the truth and it hurts I know you don’t like communication or using your words I know your minds still stuck on the bees and birds But boy just wrap it before your pockets disperse cause this is real fucking life Don’t fuck with girls like that unless you wanna make a bitch your wife For once don’t be so fucking selfish, take a look at ya life Ya think a baby gone help this? Nah ya crazy Can’t believe I ever thought a fool like you could save me It don’t phase me, I figured it out in the long run Im counting all my blessings, I didn’t end up with the wrong one Without a sound ever heard Without a lesson Ive learned You’re foolish and deluding Too many lies have you burned Bridges burn to ashes, this is your unmasking stress built up in my stomach, I subconsciously started fasting I still remember the day that I kept asking Why the fuck me, I loved this fuckboy with a passion All the lies, started running and they started running past him Sometimes thats how it goes, and nobodys quick enough to grab em phantom, of my vitality but a knight came threw and set my soul free Now I don’t fuck with the lies and they don’t fuck with me

Chorus we stayed moving on the scene from vic to bhood, down to deep cove, so sad you shoulda seen us we were on that wild child style and the town couldn’t contain us within a few months my sisters name was famous maybe infamous but either way you knew about the Gabriel’s didn’t go by that last name, tried to turn the tables in my favour, I’ll admit that it never worked out didn’t have many friends I was so filled with self-doubt Had a stepdad who hated me tryna belittle every thought if I see that motherfucker I swear im finna go off fuck that manipulation bullshit, you should get off the pot but you a crazy old hypocrite, I guess I just forgot Tore apart the family, god damn he made me angry My brother likes that fool, I just cant understand it frankly He aint a father figure he aint done much shit for us Not like my mom, working 3 jobs, for us her ass shed bust Chorus yeah yeah yeah shoutout Josh, the first son, I ain’t really got much to say it’s not like you come around, or give us the light of day but moms really loves you just wants you to be okay maybe call her on occasion, what games you tryna play? shouts to Levi, my big bro till I die we may fight I may cry but you always stay by my side Always on your team, you the realest as they come Anyone fuck with the fam, on god they better run Shout out to my sister, Latisha, yeah we all miss her Living by the streets, getting fucked up off the elixir And then theres young Z, y’all already know about me in school by day by night high off the tree we aint models, (hell no) but thats my fucking team though yeah we got our problems but you don’t know what we know We seen a lot of shit, epic longer than Marino We got bigger dreams, tryna trade Vans for Valentino Yeah & littles I swear I aint forget you Sorry Im so flakey I hope I don’t upset you keep me in your mind, while im out here on my grind Probably doesn’t make sense now but hopefully it will in time Im a sinner, don’t want you to watch me Always eat your veggies, always listen to your mommy Please don’t ever think that I don’t want you guys around me Gotta do my thing so I can be astounding

yuh, this that, this that adolescence anonymous yanno what Im saying? M3music in this bitch, let’s fucking go Red skies, red eyes/you’re my kryptonite suicide sunrise/ wanna take my life anxiety is fighting me/ I can’t fucking eat only time I feel peace is when i’m asleep all these demons in my head wishing I was dead/if my friends reach out I leave their texts on read/ things’ll get better that’s what momma and my doctor said/ well I ain’t better when i’m high on these fucking meds (ugh) Suicide sunrise looking in the mirror seeing everything that I despise Im crossing all my T’s/ Im dotting all my I’s Imma write a note, stay crying to some lullabies Emotions my disguise don’t look me in the eyes, cause I know they’ll blow my cover windows to the soul, whole minds full of clutter Thinking of ways to clear it Ask me bout my plans and Im a st-st-st-stutter Sometimes I wanna die, sometimes I wanna live then I think of all the fucked up living I already did I really burned a bridge I wanna be a role model and inspiration to the kids But I don’t believe in futures and Im living in the past I cant look em in the eyes and tell them scars don’t last Cause kids see the truth and I don’t believe that shit My only sense of calm is when I take another hit(ah) (suicide sunrise, suicide sunrise suicide sunrise, your light is my demise) x2 whisper: “zalea this is the end give up zalea it’s time do it, what are you waiting for zalea kill yourself look in the mirror Z, why are you stalling?l come on zalea their all waiting ZALEA, come on... do it”

life keeps throwing me blessings but I keep throwing out messes I’ll blame it all on adolescence or maybe on the smoke I’m just throwing out guesses All these mauls leave me breathless Stayin’ number one on my stress list when I exhale I’ll regret this like all a the snakes that i’ve given my friendship I used to have homies on some fake shit I was faded and going through phases, my life is a novel I was ripping out pages my therapist says it’s cause i’m not good with changes Crying eyes feeling loveless Trying minds go through numbness can’t unite into oneness I got insecurities in abundance All these drugs is just nonsense depressed thoughts in my subconscious One is too many but a thousands never enough if we’re being honest Hide paraphernalia in our closets Bought that shit with our bank deposits Friday to Sunday, man we go psychotic Monday to Thursday we stay neurotic Yeah, uh Drugs in my system, drugs in my veins Yeah, uh Drugs in my conscious, drugs in my brain Yeah, uh we off Pills & potions, we making it rain Yeah, uh We off pills & potions, we making it rain I need to win because failures not an option Gotta break the cycle, put the whole fam on topspin errybody looking to me, steady watching Fuck outta my face, I got habits im adopting (whoa) I really had to switch up on the flow So fucking high, I don’t know sober anymore The pressures really building don’t know how to deal with feelings All my friends were all my villains now we mad fucking chilling (aye) But things won’t ever be the same Ive seen this shit kill more than take away the pain washing out my culture, tied to us with chains government and drugs just creating new slaves Yeah, just creating new slaves, black on black crime Got us mentally encaged, Cant turn on the news cause all I feel is rage humanity is broken I’m just tryna numb the pain This shit took my sister away Crying every night, feeling numb every day Arvella Avenue seems so far away I wanna get it through her head, man what can I say? Ugh, fuck, sis I really I miss you These drugs changed your mind, why cant you see the issue My eyes give me away, can I get another tissue I wanna give you comfort, know I never meant to diss you Yeah, uh Drugs in my system, drugs in my veins Yeah, uh Drugs in my conscious, drugs in my brain Yeah, uh we off Pills & potions, we making it rain Yeah, uh We off pills & potions, we making it rain (x2)

young girl, dry your eyes you're a solider don't ever think you're weak, or listen to what them boys told ya you are a goddess, a living inspiration but ya haven't been the same since you been taking medication It's been 6 months and I'm wondering how you been? last time I had seen you, you was looking pretty thin still got the beauty of a sunrise but the lights fading started thinking you're too far past saving I try to hate you, but my heart, it just ain't with it I remember all the good times, when we dancing in the kitchen back and fourth, we constant bitching till you was put up in the system then right before my eyes, I'm forced to witness your demise that shit really heavily affected me I'd be lying if I said, I never let it get to me I'm not taking drugs, don't pressure me I'll turn it down, respectfully then go home, light some green and I'll bathe in my hypocrisy headed to arvella avenue, aint no stopping me my mission is simple: peace for the children no child on this earth deserves to grow up in a whirlwind no child on this earth deserves to feel like a burden I know your faults stem from the fact you're hurting I wish you told us sooner, instead of keeping it behind the curtain you're more than your mistakes, you're way more than worth it even though you don't see it, to me you've always been perfect on the cold cold cold nights I hope you're keeping warm I wish you were here you're my perfect storm it breaks my heart to see the life your living, be your norm everything you are is everything that I was warned not to be, but honestly you're all I really want to be, on my mind so constantly, I'd trade lives with you undoubtedly my mind is so confoundedly lost without your insanity opposite attract, I think you're really what's grounded me to sum this up, sis I really really miss ya I'm tryna not to cry, as i'm looking at your picture wishing I could hug ya and wishing I could kiss ya happy 23rd birthday to my sister

ocked myself in my room another day another sorrow sleeping too much, pills knock me out until tomorrow wake up in the darkness and Im drowning in my sadness I wish I ran out of tears when I was 18 I wish I ran out of tears, I wish I faced all my fears, I wish things seemed more clear I wish I could see my reflection in the mirror without crying and I'm trying to reach out but when I call, my friends aren't available to speak now so I just take a number and then I'll resume back to my slumber but I don't even sleep I just nap can't find enough peace of mind to let me rest so I just close my eyes and lay my hands on my chest until I'm numb to the feeling, I just stare at the ceiling sights too clouded with all my addictions and demons And Im screaming in my mind but on the outside Im silent Grumpy ass kid, who gets in a mood when she’s tired Thats all they ever said and it’s all they’re gonna say Got my prescription on lock, so I can stand another day It’s hard though puppet on display, top shelf front row Trying to decipher the critiques and the low blows wanna get myself out the gutter but Im froze I wish I could return to the flowers and colour living life through greys, can't tell the days from the other smiling is exhausting, can't stand the fake happy my cerebrals got me fucked up but no one even asks me cause no ones got me like I got them no ones ever fought for me like I fought for them but then again no ones wants to talk to me honestly, fake conversation full of empty words and promises tell me you miss me but never hit me up won't ever see you again knowing my fucking luck think of Dan often, man that shit was rough trying to make it through the year, you know that it's been tough using tokes to find some serendipity but it'll never be enough you know it'll never be enough but Imma still try cause I like the high and I'm still a sad kid but I don't know why it's all situational, the pain used to be occasional now it's like a mountain and I can't climb it but I damn well know, there's a life of purpose behind it and i'm gonna find it highlight, cause Im shining face full of makeup to try and feel confident darken my eyes, I don't see anything wrong with it but underneath all of it, I'm still just a poser at best Delusional, hypocritical, introverted psycho Who might go, insane from the pain, who’s to know? Who’s to know, who’s to know? Who know what my personal be like the best? Who listen to me cry, bout how everyone I loved left Who tells me pretty lies who aint wish me no goodbyes My modern day bestie, who on the daily just depress me Every plan we have, is rescheduled till next week But next week never come so I stay down make some temporary friends to hang out with for now but it's all so 17, plastic and paper nothing's really real, friends vanish like vapor and once I'm gone everyone gone be talkin bout how "now who could have saved her?” Who coulda? locked myself in my room another day another sorrow sleeping too much, pills knock me out until tomorrow wake up in the darkness and Im drowning in my sadness

Yeah It’s zalea Moonlight gang you already know Shoutout, shoutout to the kids going through some real shit right now, I gotchu Uh, these days are so insane my mind is like a mixture of sunshine clouds & rain marks on all on my body, think its gonna leave a stain Staring in the mirror and my parents think Im vain uh, & my friends are all my foes now snakes cut out the grass yanno Im ten toes down Sorry Im not a cool kid Sorry Im just a class clown Sorry Im a time bomb Im about to go off now adolescence anonymous society ain’t never been proud of us put our opinions to the side just collecting dust this that, this that adolescence anonymous adolescence anonymous There aint a damn thing wrong with us We are the creators, we’re all made from angel dust This that, this that adolescence anonymous school sucks, all my teachers out to get me Skipping all my classes cause my demons out to temp me knowledge in the streets, brain chemistry reinvent me All of my protectors suddenly became the enemy, ugh I feel hate from within, someone tell me how I’m not s’posed to sin drugs are cheaper than books moneys so paper thin How’d I pass all these classes? Im scratching my chin *break* lately i’ve been on that fuck responsibilities I wanna make music living life through auxiliaries All these grown ups telling me how I outta be Regulating rules, no drugs no sodimy the system is really what bothers me making war instead of art, killing all creativity they ain’t here for the culture, they don’t see the longevity yeah i’m from the north but the states is really scarin me all my dead brothers gunned down for wearing hair like me kids marching for their lives, I really need some clarity stress built in our dna no wonder we all dying from the fentys and the xanys nigga what else can I say? adolescence anonymous society ain’t never been proud of us put our opinions to the side just collecting dust this that, this that adolescence anonymous adolescence anonymous There aint a damn thing wrong with us We are the creators, we’re all made from angel dust This that, this that adolescence anonymous